Let’s Denounce Saurav Ganguly and All Hail Greg “Underarm” Chappell

I think it is the right time to “denounce” Saurav Ganguly, India’s most successful cricket captain ever, and “All Hail” Greg “underarm” Chappell, who is incidentally as well known for his underarm tactics in the infamous game with New Zealand as his cricketing acumen. After all he in his “infinite wisdom” has found Ganguly to be guilty of what were thought to be his greatest traits like finally creating a Team India that you saw in Natwest and last World Cup. Not to mention Greg has the support of “cricketers” like Raj Singh “so rabidly fanatic and partisan that isn’t even laughable anymore” Dungarpur and Sharad Power, whose best games are played in the corridors of congressional politics.

Down with Ganguly I say. After all we are succeeding too often these days. It was better in the days of Aj-har-uddin (Aj+Har means in Bengali - Defeat Today) where Indian team had developed this endearing habit of running in fright facing any kind of pace bowling abroad and scampering like chicken caught in headlight, not to mention an almost 0% rate of win. The best you could hope when Indian team was abroad was a draw.

Dilip Vengsarkar once said that one can gauge the pace and bounce of a bowler by watching Azharuddin jump at every ball from the other end.

And then in home ground you prepare real “turner” pitches where even your great-grandmother can bowl like Warne and Muralidharan combined, in the hope of slightly redeeming yourself.

I miss these glory days. I am sure Australia misses them too. After all Sourav didn’t give Australian’s much peace during India’s tour; so much so that they finally crumbled in England. Who wouldn’t want him out of team? If I was an Australian, or English (remember shirt-waving Sourav after beating them in Natwest final?) I would too.

I am positive Rahul “Lackey” Dravid can bring back the “glory” days of Indian cricket. I really like the way he makes his “wall” (intelligent like a wall) like decisions as captain as seen in Sri Lanka.

Our “glory” days will be back again - where the “meek shall inherit” under Greg Almighty (pronounced like Bruce Almighty). We will share the fate of the Australian league team he coached before he assumed the mantle in India.

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4 Responses to “Let’s Denounce Saurav Ganguly and All Hail Greg “Underarm” Chappell”

  1. greatbong Says:

    Aj Haar: “The boys didnt play well..mm mmm”. Loved his batting. Hated his captaincy.

  2. Administrator Says:

    You can also say: A Jhar

    His batting was ok (in India without pressure and with a weak opponent) but always crumbled rather sadly under pressure. In those days save Sunil Gavaskar (and later Kapil Dev) it appeared none of Indian batsmen had any spines at all. They crumbled worse than humpty dumpty after his great fall; everytime.

  3. Senthil Srinivasan Says:

    You guys wishing Ganguly’s ouster are all living in a fool’s paradise. Ganguly is to Team India what sugar is to milk. Indispensable. Reliable. and Dependable (sorry Rahul). He is the only Australian in Team India. If India is to really win the World Cup it needs a strong charismatic leader, who can inspire and sacrifice for his team, not a “gentlemanly” Hijra like Dravid. Rahul does not know the taste of blood, he is a veggie. Ganguly is, so reinstate him as captain before it is too late.

  4. Angsuman Says:

    @Senthil
    The above piece was satire. Please read it again :)

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